Cheetos To You!

Eme presenting to me the
Tell Them "Cheetos to you!" Award

Internet Nation, I accidentally got myself a catch phrase.

I make no secret about who I am, what I do, and the things I enjoy. I talk, you know? When I like things, I like to share that information with my friends so that maybe they will spend some of their hard-earned moneydollars on those things, too. Sometimes it happens in the other direction, although I try not to be a Cranky Cathy if I can help it. I'm curmudgeonly; I'm not rude. Usually. So it's pretty common knowledge that I like Tell Them, the organization and the women who run it. I advocate on their behalf, I contribute to their blog, and I participate in their online events. Internet, It Is Known. (It is known)

It's the online part which brings us here today. Like Vikings punter and glimmering sparklepony Chris Kluwe, my writing career was primarily born from the gaming communities (he's referred to such communities as "a seething pit of ignoramuses, born of misspoken children on the internet"), where, as he said, "if you go after someone, you'd better make sure you've got your ducks in a row or they're going to come right back at you". I'm in complete agreement with Mr. Kluwe: If I'm going to call you out, "the only way to do so without being ignored is to craft a completely logical argument that has a hook."

Which brings us to how I intervened in a fingerquote discussion fingerquote on Tell Them's facebook page. You can read the entire thread for yourself, if you want. It doesn't matter what you're saying or how reasonable your argument may be. If you start with hate, the rest of your argument, however logical it may be, is automatically a pile of poop. So, I replied, and then declared to friends "BABAM! They just got JBeebled!". And so #jbeebled you can now get, and it is a thing you can be, and be careful because it is typically contagious.

I was henceforth crowned Queen Bee of the World and a motion was carried to replace the word "kudos" with "cheetos". You might not even believe me if I told you how many women were saying "CHEETOS TO YOU!" yesterday. Heh. The thing is, Internet Nation: DON'T HATE. EDUCATE. And CHEETOS TO YOU, from the Tell Them "Cheetos to You" Award recipient and Queen Bee of the World, March 2013.

BABAM! You just got JBEEBLED!

Why, Hobby Lobby, Why?

Source: Tell Them!

As you might have noticed by now, sometimes I write things, and these things are occasionally for contribution to other websites or organizations.

Here's one I wrote recently for a South Carolina based non-profit, my former office neighbors and buddies over at Tell Them! Presently the post shows over 450 combined visible shares, which I believe makes it their second most popular blog post (to date). I guess we hit a nerve?

Without further rambles: please enjoy my ranting and raving over at the Tell Them! blog in a guest post entitled Why, Hobby Lobby Why?!: Experiencing the Five Stages of Hobby Lobby Grief.

SC Governor Nikki Haley Contradicts Science, Just Because

"South Carolina's major exports are peaches, shrimp, and fodder for late night comedians." - Susanna King

Update 4/9/12: This post was featured as a guest article for Tell Them on April 4, 2012. Tell Them is a program of the New Morning Foundation, a statewide, reproductive health-focused foundation based in Columbia, South Carolina. In addition to making grants to improve reproductive health education and clinical access for citizens under age 30, the Foundation is committed to serving as a leading advocate for improving the state’s sexual health policies.

If there's one thing I never could stand, it's South Carolina politics. The Daily Show's Jon Stewart calls South Carolina "America's whoopie cushion", a nod to the countless jokes told about the regularly-occurring gaffes in the SC political arena. As a resident of the "famously hot" state of South Carolina for over 15 years now, most of the time I just roll my eyes and chuckle along with the rest of the country (world?), when SC shows up on the blooper reel.

But then this happened:

Dang it, Governor Haley! This is why we can't have nice things!

That is the governor of the state of South Carolina, Nikki Haley, appearing on ABC's The View on Tuesday April 03, 2012. I almost can't believe that anybody growing up female could bring herself to say such a thing without genuine fear of sprouting a Pinocchio nose and/or her pants bursting into flames on national television. Women do indeed care about contraception, and we care a great deal.

Governor Haley, like a lot of women, is an educated and successful person. She holds a B.A. in Accounting from Clemson University, and among numerous accomplishments on her way to becoming governor, she spent six years in SC House of Representatives.

Would Governor Haley have been able to meet her goals without access to, or use of, contraceptives? Anecdotally, one might say 'sure, maybe so'. Statistically, however, it's much more likely that the answer would be 'probably not'.

Here's why:

According to the famous 2002 paper "The Power of the Pill", the earlier a woman has access to contraceptives, the more likely she is to complete higher education and career goals . The authors state "The most persuasive evidence for a role of the pill is that its initial diffusion among single women coincided with, and is analytically related to, the increase in the age at first marriage and the increase in women in professional degree programs."

Forbes goes so far as to state that we women have "The Pill to thank for 30%" of our paychecks, in their report on a recently-released study of over 4000 women by researchers at University of Michigan.

So here I am, stating for the record: I care. If you live in South Carolina and you care, too, you can use this handy email form courtesy of Tell Them! to tell Governor Haley that you DO care about contraception, and that you do NOT support legislation which restricts your access to it. If you live outside of South Carolina, well, enjoy the current ridiculousness, and be glad it isn't you. Residents of Arizona, of course, exempt.

Internet Nation, I'll leave you with this quote, courtesy of my favorite astrophysicist: “The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it.” Neil deGrasse Tyson